The Geekiest Girl

A few of my favorite things…

Archive for the month “May, 2012”

Your New State-of-the-Art, Space-Age, Awesometastic Movie Theater!

The movie theater of THE FUTURE

Movie theaters are good, but they could be AWESOME with these three simple changes:

BUILD IT UNDERGROUND!
(That’s the entrance. Right there. Between the lampposts.)

Theaters are giant windowless boxes soaking in the sun and using up tons of kilowatts keeping the place nice and cool. What a waste! Put them underground!

Underground movie theaters are energy-efficient and just plain prettier. From the outside. No more giant beige box. However, it’s best to keep the lobby above ground so the staff don’t turn into complete troglodytes.

TICKET/SNACK KIOSKS!

Imagine a row of high-tech kiosks where you can buy your tickets and/or order your snacks for pickup AT THE SAME TIME. Pay for everything at the kiosk, print out your ticket, pick up your snack and GO WATCH THAT DAMN MOVIE!

Fear not! This will not put teenagers out of work. They can staff the regular ticket counters for moviegoers who just can’t handle that there new-fangled technology stuff.

Also, sadly, we still need people to prepare the food. AND techs to fix the kiosks when they break. (Or at least to hang an out-of-order sign on them.)

*Thanks to my hubby Dale for this idea! 🙂

BATHROOMS IN THE THEATER!

No more 10 minute trek to and from the bathroom all while missing a major plot point. Just install a bathroom (or two) just inside the door of each theater at the cineplex.

Each bathroom will have red lighting for less light leakage. There will also be closed circuit TVs showing the same movie as in your theater! Located inside each stall and above the sinks, you’ll never miss a moment!

SPECIAL SPACE-AGED BONUS IMPROVEMENT: THE PERFECT SEATING EVERY TIME!

You’ll always have the perfect seat with the new parallel universe seating arrangements! Using quantum mechanics, multi-dimensional fractals and Schrödinger’s Cat, there is one block of seats in the perfect spot and EVERYONE can sit in it at the same time watching the same movie.

For a few bucks extra, you can buy that seat in a block so you and your friends can sit together!

For double the price of a matinée ticket, you can get the full theater experience: images of everyone else sitting in the theater are projected around you, giving you the full audience effect! Additional features include video and audio, or, for a quieter experience, restrict audio just to standard audience reactions such as gasps, laughter and screams!

A bonus to this bonus: fewer physicists will be out of work creating and maintaining this theater attraction! That’s right, physicists can work in the entertainment industry!!!!! And get free tickets! Sexy!

YOUR NEW AWESOMETASTIC MOVIE THEATER OF THE FUTURE!

So get your friends together and demand to be the first in the nation with a very special, state-of-the-art, space-age, awesometastic, underground, kiosked, interior toileted, multi-dimensional seating theater!

Inside the Sun: Yoshida Brothers Remix

Forget the Wii commercials where you first heard this and just listen.

Preferably in your car.

With the top down.

On a winding road.

With no other traffic.

The sunset is straight ahead.

You are driving to the first reading of your new collection of short stories.

All your friends will be there. Some of your idols will be too.

This is the beginning.

What do YOU hear when you listen? Comment below!

How Short is Too Short?

When the writing gets tough, the writer changes things up with a writing challenge: 240-character short stories! (Like a tweet!)

 

TIDINESS

Sara massaged her painfully stubbed toe. That’d teach her to leave dead bodies lying around in the kitchen. After all, just because you kill demons and save the world, doesn’t mean you get to give up on tidiness.

 

THE JOKE

“…and that’s why squirrels eat nuts!” Sam shook so hard with laughter his drink spilled on the mahogany table. I hadn’t heard the first part of the joke. I was watching the black car just outside the window, waiting in the moonlight.

TEA

Justin drinks Earl Gray tea. He says it reminds him of a college trip to Ireland where he wandered the hills, read Ulysses and felt erudite. But I know it reminds him of Captain Picard from Star Trek. He’s just too embarrassed to admit it.

 

IT’S YOUR TURN

 Got a super-short story of your own? I’d love to read it. Post it in the comments below!

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